Okay so I know it's been a whole nother month since I blogged. And I know I said that last time too. Anyone who might be reading this, please don't hurt me. :) this will be another post of random things I've thought about lately.
- Someone I know just said "I swear to God, who I don't believe in." Then please tell me, WHAT WAS THE EVER LOVING POINT? People are stupid.
- I had a weird dream last night. I dreamed I came upon my friend Sarah & she was crying. I asked what was wrong, she said nothing. I said "No, no, tell me! It's ME. You can always talk to me." She said she was sad cause she had fallen down the stairs & nobody cared, and that she had no friends. I hugged her and told her it was okay, and that I would be her friend. She was still crying so I held her hand, like friends do. I remember feeling like we were on the same level of life.
- I also dreamed that there was an issue at school & I had to get home. I ran out to my car (weird cause I've never even driven) and drove out of the parking lot with expertise. I picked up this guy I know who also needed to get home. We took turns driving, and I suddenly found myself very attracted to this guy, and I could tell he liked me too. My thoughts suddenly turned to sex, then I was like UHHHHH. So weird!
- I was really happy one day last week because the most popular, prettiest, well-dressed girl in the 11th grade asked ME for something. I'm not even jealous of her, I just admire the confident person she seems to be. I also remember she followed me on twitter last summer; she followed me FIRST. I didn't know she knew I existed.
- I'm appreciating life more and more these days. It's only by the grace of God that I am still alive & kicking, with all the things that could happen to people these days. I am blessed with a middle-upper class lifestyle, and I'm so happy. I don't have everything, but would life be worth anything if we all got everything we wanted? I volunteered at a kid's hospital recently & a little girl told me how her family opened their presents early because they would be at the hospital for Christmas. I'll be with my family opening my gifts. Wow.
- I don't know what to do about my crush! People say he likes me, but I don't know. I get so nervous when I'm around him, and everything I can think of to say that's witty suddenly seems lame. His smile automatically makes me smile, it's like a baby puppy running through a meadow. When he looks at me I just feel tingly. I go through his Facebook pictures. And if he asked for my last piece of gum (not that he would), by all means boy, HAVE IT. That's it. I'm sprung for this guy. I really like him. I can't stop thinking about kissing him. I haven't kissed a boy in 2 years. His near-perfect lips drive me crazy, guys. I want to go to a party and pretend I didn't know he'd be there & kiss him under some freaking mistletoe on New Year's. I want to hold his hand and go on dates with food and kiss him more because that's what people who really like each other do. I just need to hear from him that he does, too.
- I'm writing a song! Four actually. A no-sense song, my non-lovey love song (I don't know lol), a slow Jesus song I'm gonna call Allegiance to You, and a praise song! IT IS HARD. For the record.
Well that was a lot. It's 2:15 in the morning, I should go to bed.
Take care, honeybears!
xoxo, Erin
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